cat: [makes a small friendly noise]

me: oh my god. ohhhh my god. oh my god. oh my god. oh my god. do it again. oh my god.

100% proven zodiac analyses

aries: short-tempered kind-hearted babies

taurus: stubborn knucklehead cuties who are nice to everyone

gemini: intelligent blabber-mouths w a great sense of humor

cancer: over-emotional compassionate lil cupcakes

leo: melodramatic fun-loving fucks

virgo: creative whiny pissbabies who are intellectually stimulating

libra: ditsy carefree pacifist qts

scorpio: intensely emotional secretive bad bitches

sagittarius: honest philosophical travel-agents who don't give a fuck

capricorn: organized self-driven sarcastic dickheads

aquarius: extroverted detached open-minded freaks

pisces: sensitive lazyasses who are ideological + creatively stimulating

14 years old: I'm young but I know what I want. This isn't that hard, I'm all grown up already and have everything figured out.

17 years old: Well, this is a little harder than I thought. School is almost ending. What am I going to do with my life?

21 years old: What the fuck is going on? Where are my socks?